Upon advice of a friend, I’ve decided to grant cat a temporary reprieve from exile.
All the catnip toys have been tossed. Even a little whiff of this stuff is obviously driving my cat insane.
And no more liver in the food, as this apparently makes poo stink horribly.
And we’ll try a different litter and see what happens.
I think I can say conclusively that the cat experiment is an absolute failure. My mental health has been in continuous decline since the cat came in to my life.
I can’t sleep, since the cat keeps crawling on my face to get to the nightstand to either drink out of my water glass or knock everything on the floor. I can’t work because I’m constantly interrupted by the sound of something else crashing to the floor.
This cat is destroying everything. I have to keep everything out of her reach, and she’s finding new and interesting ways to get into my shit.
And the smell. She shits, and the whole house instantly reeks. Even if I clean the shit out of the box immediately and spray the hell out of the place with lysol, it still reeks of shit for an hour. Cat shit is possibly the most foul smelling excretion you will ever experience.
So, either she goes or I go. And since I’m the one paying the mortgage on this place, I’m staying. By the end of the week, she’ll be Someone Else’s Cat.
Neither do I. It’s quiet. No hum. No background noise.
I used to have to meditate for an hour to get to this state. Now I can sit still, and my brain goes calm.
It’s never done that before.
I have no words. Maybe later.
Did the Big E yesterday. I do NOT like it when strangers touch me. And they did way too much of that yesterday.
And that still freaks me out.
Too many people. Too much traffic. Never going on a Saturday again. NEVER.
Interesting. I could feel a bogus anxiety attack (that’s what I call it when there’s literally nothing I’m anxious about but my body goes batshit anyhow) starting. And it just kinda faded out. I can still get nervous about stuff I should be nervous about, but it’s not crippling like it once was.
If you’d told me that a little pill less than a centimeter in diameter could have this much impact on my life, I’d have told you that you were mad.
Yet another major milestone for me. I was in the presence of children all day Sunday. I did not freak out even once.
In fact, I think I rather enjoyed it.
I don’t know yet if this is a good thing or a bad thing. I’ll get back to you.
What other possible explanation is there for my getting 93% on Expert on “Let Love Rule”?
Had an anxious day. I doubt it was the coffee, since I was getting this way without coffee before, and I had coffee and tea without feeling all shaky and dodgy.
It didn’t last all day, which was promising.
Had a few people comment that I’m a lot more mellow suddenly.
Better living through chemistry!
I made it through two days in a row without any major anxiety or depression.
Is this what people mean when they say they feel “good”?